Glimpses

Each new day that I spend here I feel like I get a glimpse. A glimpse into the heart of God, a glimpse into the life of one woman, a glimpse into the mysteries of this vastly different culture. The other night as I laid in bed I just started to weep. All of the sudden all of the brokenness of this place and this world hit me. I was so heartbroken over all the evil and depravity and it simply overwhelmed me to the point of being sick. But the next morning we had an amazing morning of worship (our makeshift church service since we accidentally slept in) and God spoke to my heart in a profound way. I realized that all of the things that were breaking my heart the night before are the same evils that I am capable of. This is a devastatingly humble realization. But rather than feeling conviction or guilt I was simply broken. In that moment I caught just a fraction, a glimpse, of how God feels when He sees His children, those made in His image, driven by their flesh. It breaks His heart! All of this has come together for me to feel an even deeper compassion for this ministry to Red Light women. I found it such an honor for God to allow me to see a piece of His heart. I really feel that the prayers of our team have been coming to fruition, that we might realize our own brokenness so that we can live in community with the broken. The amazing thing is, it doesn't end with being broken. Because we serve God incarnate, we can connect our humanity to spirituality, and experience being made whole and living in hope! This is what we so desire for the women we're working with as well. They have just begun their journey to freedom, and we fervently pray they will experience new life with Christ. Something the three of us have been grappling with is how to incorporate this paradox of brokenness and wholeness into our daily lives. It is an interesting and rewarding journey!

Other glimpses that have touched my heart:
-one woman in particular, who likes to hold our arm and walk down the street with us as we come out from our hostel. She just follows a few steps, smiles, and then goes on her way
-little schoolgirls who get so excited and giggly when they see us
-the two-toothed rickshaw driver who rings his bell every morning and offers a ride
-the smile and laughter of Annie, a friend I've made at Freeset (she works with me in the marking room)

So these are just a few of the insights that I've had so far - from my heart to yours. I hope this gives you all a glimpse into our daily life here. I know some of it is rather heavy, but it is real, and I feel right now that it's all I can offer. Although our team is experiencing intensity like this every day, we are also experiencing so much joy and hope, like the list of things above. God is so good and faithful, and we feel Him guiding us every step of the way. Thank you sooo much for all of your prayers and diligent reading! We appreciate you more than you know! Please pray for the other team from Simpson, that will be arriving tomorrow. We are really looking forward to spending time with them, and know it will do our hearts good to see some familiar faces! Love you all so much. God's peace and power be with you.

In His Grip, Cassie